Magic parent moment

Yesterday afternoon I was doing my best to finish up some work while at home. My son Travis needed attention, though, as he had a math assignment he needed to finish. To his credit, he went right to work at it once he got home but soon became stumped and frustrated.

He asked me to read his assignment to him and I did, though it drew more responses from him saying it was okay if he didn’t understand it. Knowing Travis, though, I knew he would get this assignment as it involved managing money. He is very money-aware and the problem’s scenario involved keeping a balance sheet for family savings.

As I explained the problem to him and pointed out how to fill out the balance sheet, he hopped into my lap. Soon I was gently stepping him through the problem, marveling at the light bulb coming on in his head as he figured out what was being asked. Suddenly, the once insurmountable math homework was easily conquered and Travis was happily flying the flight simulator that once had to wait. We spent the rest of the evening happily crashing Cessna Citation-X’s into the ground.

I’m no dummy, I’m getting old and my kids are growing up fast. The opportunities to have my kids hop into my lap while we work on homework are becoming fewer and farther between. It was a real treat to help Travis over his frustration and get to play parental hero one more time.

Ex-spooks debate Snowden’s actions

I’m a member of a Facebook group called United States Navy Cryptologic Technicians. Last week a member authored a post which questioned why NSA leaker Edward Snowden wasn’t being hunted down with all available resources. It spawned a very lively debate amongst ex-spooks about Snowden’s motives and those of the NSA, a debate which continues as I post this. There are many former spooks like myself who find the NSA’s new reach to be quite alarming, while others seem to be comfortable with Americans’ almost complete lack of online privacy. Several point out that Snowden took an oath to protect this information and broke his oath.

I took a similar oath when gained my security clearance. Like every other servicemember, however, the first oath I took was support and defend the Constitution of the United States “against all enemies, foreign and domestic.” To the extent that the latter conflicts with the former, the former (being the law of the land) always takes precedence. In addition, it was drilled into us as sailors that it was our duty to disobey an unlawful order. In hindsight this is far easier to say than do, as in practice disobeying a lawful order would most likely put you in a world of hurt. At least the government would come out looking good during your court-martial.
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Fixing the home

Friday I was chatting with a neighborhood parent when she told me of a disturbing incident she witnessed as she drove through my neighborhood earlier this summer.

As she was passing one house, she saw a woman getting into a car at the curb as a young boy, probably 7 or 8, came running up to her. Anticipating a loving scene where the boy gets a big hug from his mom, my friend was instead shocked to see the woman turn and strike the boy with the back of her hand, knocking him to the ground!

The kid picked himself up off the ground and calmly walked back into the house. It was as if this wasn’t the first time that this kid had been hit.

I was aghast. Hearing this broke my heart. This kid lives in my neighborhood. I’ve waved to him many times as he’s quietly ridden his bike around his front yard, always by himself. He seems like a good kid but that’s beside the point. What the hell was this woman thinking to hit a child like that? How screwed up is she to think this is okay?
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Labor Day lake visit

Yesterday the family packed up some snacks, supplies, and the dog and drove up to Lake Gaston to visit our family friends, the Naylors, at their lakehouse for the day. We had a nice ride around the lake on their pontoon boat, stopping in a cove to go for a quick swim before returning to their house. Storm clouds were approaching by that time so we stayed inside and caught up. It was a wonderful visit with wonderful friends.

On the way back those storm clouds continued darkening and 45 minutes into the drive home the bottom absolutely fell out. I spent a good 15 minutes driving through very heavy rain! It reached its fiercest when we neared Franklinton but never completely ended. By the time we got into Raleigh we were hitting large puddles all along Atlantic Avenue and Kelly saw Crabtree Creek nearing the top of the bridge at Hodges St. Fortunately for us it stopped raining almost exactly as long as it took us to unload the major things from the car.

At some point yesterday afternoon I developed a raging headache which continued through dinner and never let up. Driving in a heavy rain did little to relieve it, too. I got home and decided the only thing that could make me feel better was a shower and bed. I was asleep by 10 after 9. I feel better now, though.

North Hills and Brier Creek

Last week I had a delightful opportunity to meet my friend Mandy for lunch at a restaurant in Brier Creek. Not being familiar with the shopping center, I managed to park a short distance from my destination and spent a good 10 minutes walking from building to building to find it.

The walk made me realize just how vehicle-centric Brier Creek truly is. There are few or no sidewalks anywhere in the parking lots. There are no crosswalks at its internal intersections, either. The whole time I was on foot I felt like a sitting duck as cars whizzed by me. It seemed that shopping centers like Brier Creek fit an outdated mold of shops plunked down amidst acres and acres of parking lots. Sure, the stores are shiny and new but the paradigm is a dinosaur.
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NSA spying on Americans proves not too effective

I was reading this Wired article from last year, well before Edward Snowden’s leak that revealed to the world the massive overreach of the NSA. Kevin Paulson pointed out these terrorist incidents the NSA failed to uncover:

And while there is little indication that [NSA’s] actual effectiveness has improved—after all, despite numerous pieces of evidence and intelligence-gathering opportunities, it missed the near-disastrous attempted attacks by the underwear bomber on a flight to Detroit in 2009 and by the car bomber in Times Square in 2010.

You can also add the Boston Marathon bombing and the Fort Hood mass shooting to this list, too. News came out earlier this week that the FBI monitored Fort Hood shooter Nidal Hasan’s communications a full year in advance. The mass murderer even sent emails discussing jihad to a cleric in Yemen, which would be a kosher intercept in anyone’s book (even mine). Yet, he still committed his crime.
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U.S. allows states to legalize recreational marijuana within limits

This is great news. I’ve said it before but I hope North Carolina’s leaders will become enlightened and the guns will disappear from Raleigh’s streets. Yeah, that’s asking a lot but this is a huge step in the right direction.

The Justice Department said it would refocus marijuana enforcement nationwide by bringing criminal charges only in eight defined areas – such as distribution to minors – and giving breathing room to users, growers and related businesses that have feared prosecution.

The decisions end nearly a year of deliberation inside President Barack Obama’s administration about how to react to the growing movement for relaxed U.S. marijuana laws.

Advocates for legalization welcomed the announcement as a major step toward ending what they called “marijuana prohibition.”

via U.S. allows states to legalize recreational marijuana within limits | Reuters.

Busing blues

Hallie boards her bus on the first day of school

Hallie boards her bus on the first day of school


Hallie has taken the bus to and from school for a week now and it’s been a bit of a rough ride for her (and not only from the traffic whizzing by her stop). She’s enjoying life in middle school but complains at how rude and unruly the kids are on the bus. On the bus, these kids play their music loudly when they’re told not to, then pretend not to hear the bus driver. They curse frequently, throw their trash out the window. They’re basically hellions.

This is so foreign to Hallie as she’s mostly ridden her bike to school until now. So today I took her through the carpool. While she still has to take the bus home, at least she doesn’t have to begin her school day in a bad mood.

Thinking about her observations made me shake my head at how some of these kids are being raised. Hallie quite astutely said she knows that some parents can be great parents and their kids still act up, but she has a feeling that the kids on her bus have parents who are just like them: parents who have no respect for others.

I don’t judge people based on how much money they make, what they look like, where they live, or any other external factor. I do divide people based on one thing: how they treat others. You can be filthy rich or dirt poor and still be a self-centered asshole. If you treat others fairly and with respect, it doesn’t matter who you are or where you come from, odds are pretty good that you’ll succeed in life. I consistently remind my kids that the most telling thing about one’s character is how they treat others.
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Distracted driving day

As if to prove yesterday’s point about distracted driving, on my way home from work I had the unfortunate luck to be driving next to a young woman busy texting. Her car was weaving over both sides of her lane, on Wade Avenue, nontheless, where opposing traffic whizzes by only a foot or two away. I honked the time she nearly nudged me off the road and spent the rest of my drive glowering at her in my rear-view mirror, hoping she had enough sense to notice if I stopped.

I have never before called the cops on anyone texting while driving but I swear that drivers doing this might as well be driving drunk. The next dumbshit driver that weaves into my lane, hunched over his or her phone, is going to be promptly referred to authorities. I don’t feel like playing Russian Roulette on the roads anymore.

Warner Herzog created a short, powerful film that addresses this texting problem. I’m going to make sure our kids see it.

Getting the zombie band back together

As a family we’ve participated in some fun events over the last few years. I’ve mentioned our musical performances as “The Highlanders,” where we’ve played at a few recitals. That’s been fun and I’ve kinda missed the chance to play. I’ve been kicking around the idea of just inviting my neighbors over for regular jam sessions.

This week, Travis’s piano teacher told us that she was working on another gig for the Highlanders, this time playing at some event. I don’t have the details but I think it’s fun to think about!

Yesterday, we got contacted by our friends over at Mordecai Historic Park. They’re lining up zombies already for their Haunted Mordecai Trolley and wondered if we as a zombie family would be willing to perform again. One of the chosen dates is Halloween and another is Travis’s birthday, which would be hard to pull off, but the other, the 19th, at least would work for us. Both kids were enthusiastic about the idea.

I’m so glad we have these quirky opportunities to be total hams together.