There’s No Chinese Word for “OSHA”

Someone told me that they once asked a Chinese woman whether she would be taking a tram up to the Great Wall of China, rather than walk.

“Oh, no,” she replied, shaking her head. “China not known for safety!”

She ain’t kidding. China’s idea of safety is at odds with the rest of the world.

I first saw this on a tour of the Temple of Heaven, I believe. I walked past a two-foot-wide hole in the brick, topped by a foot-high rim. An old well, according to our guide, and one with no visible means of keeping anyone from falling into it.

I turned to Richard, my Brit tourist. “You know, if this was America,” I cracked,”that well would be well-marked with a group of lawyers, handing out business cards.”

The one that beat all was the one I saw on the taxi ride on the way home. As we stopped on a side street, I looked over to see a man on a store’s front stoop holding a drill. His right foot was balanced on a small chair. His left foot was balanced on a stack of plastic kids’ step stools. He was holding the drill above his head, apparently using it to drill out some metal inside a light fixture in front of his store.

And yes, he was not wearing safety goggles, leaving whatever he was drilling to fall right in his face. He would’ve earned bonus points had the light fixture been energized, but I had no way of knowing.

China controls population growth through birth limits. Its lack of safety standards is the other means of population control.

Destinated!

I’m back home this morning having flown 10,000 miles yesterday. Boy, are my arms tired! Heh.

My flight from Newark wasn’t without its snafus, either. We boarded 20 minutes late, finally pushed back and taxied about 10 feet before waiting another 20 minutes to get “sequenced” into the takeoff line. You can imagine my joy when the captain announced we were “30th for takeoff.” Man, you just gotta love Newark. Another 45 minutes and finally we left the ground, spending what I thought was an unusual amount of time rolling before pointing skyward.

A Continental pilot was catching a ride back to Raleigh. Since the plane was full, he rode in the jumpseat in the cockpit. I heard laughter from the cockpit more than once while we were waiting to take off.

When we landed at RDU we took runway 5R: the preferred one for Continental as its closest to Terminal A. The plane touched down and decelerated nicely but then the pilot did something unusual. We rolled gently right past the first available taxiway back to the very next one, for no apparent reason. The pilot then turned onto this taxiway, did a big circle and then proceeded to use the first taxiway to roll right back onto the active runway!

Yes, our ace pilot actually used an active runway as a taxiway, rolling down 5R in the wrong direction! I was freaking out when I saw the landing stripes roll by my window. I don’t think the pilot asked the tower’s permission because he never paused at all between rolling off the runway and rolling back on. I think he was just distracted by the extra pilot in the cockpit. I’ve never had a pilot pull that kind of stunt before. I was glad it was after 11 PM and the airport wasn’t busy.

Moral to this story: if its late and you see a pilot catching a ride in the cockpit, pack a parachute.

Anyway, I feel surprisingly rested and ready to go, so I’ll try working from home today. Its good to be back.

Back In The USSA

I’m on American soil once again after my flight from Beijing landed about 90 minutes ago. Going through customs was a relative breeze, though the luggage carousel stalled for about 10 minutes, boosting my blood pressure in the process. By the time I’d gotten my bags the earlier flight to Raleigh had already boarded. Its a good thing I opted in advance to take the 8:50 flight.

The flight was smooth and mostly uneventful. We were 30 minutes outside of Newark when I was absent-mindedly gazing out at the hills of upstate New York. I caught myself thinking – with no explanation – that now if anything happened to the plane at least I’d be on American soil.

The next thing out of my mouth was “oh shit!” The plane had just began banking toward Newark when a small corporate jet passed right in front of us! I’d guess there was less than two miles between us. If it weren’t for altitude separation rules we may have collided. I don’t know if our pilot saw the approaching plane since we were in the middle of a turn.

We took a more westerly route back to America, passing west until Korea before we headed north. Once we had crossed the International Date Line, I popped open the window shade and was treated to a nice surprise. The arora borealis was active on the left side of the plane, painting the dark sky with a glowing green curtain. It was my first ever glimpse of this eerily beautiful phenomenon.

I’ve got an hour before my plane boards so I’ll have some time to check up on email and the like before finally getting home around 11. Yay!

Homecoming Day!

Today I start the long journey home, and I couldn’t be more psyched. Its been fun being here, as you can probably tell, but I really miss my family. If we were all it would be far more fun to explore. Right now I’m missing my hugs and kisses.

Its time for breakfast, followed by a reluctant journey to the markets. I’m so not looking forward to the noisy, high-pressure hawking found there. I’ve been putting it off but I still need to get some gifts.

My flight leaves 4 PM Beijing time (4 AM EDT), trackable here once we’ve crossed the Arctic ocean. Perhaps after breakfast Sunday it’ll be working.

I’ve posted yesterday’s pictures to the gallery. It shows the Jinmao Tower in the Podong (east river) side of Shangjai. The Jinmao Tower is 88 floors tall and commands a spectacular view of Shanghai on days where there’s no air pollution. In other words, rarely. It was worth a look, though.
I couldn’t help but think of the missing World Trade Center towers while I was up there. I hope that crime is solved someday.

I found it funny that an even taller building was going up next door. It’s never enough. Incidentally, the whole Podong side was nothing but farmland in 1990. All those towering skyscrapers are relatively new.

Also included are a few shots of the lobby of the Shanghai hotel where I stayed, just for reference.

Now, time for breakfast. The hours are counting down!

Back From Shanghai Tour

I’m back from my Shanghai tour and I am hugely disappointed in the tour itself. It was a big waste of time. We went to some nice places but the issue was the tour guide. The pamphlet promises a “smiling, English-speaking tour guide,” but our guide, named Sheila, smiled only in the way that a dragon smiles before cooking you with a puff of fiery breath. What’s more, her employer is Jin Jiang Optional Tours Center a government-owned tour company, so she was a bit of a commie true believer.

Our first destination was an active buddhist temple. Right off the bat Sheila spouted a ridiculous line about China recognizing religious freedom in its constitution. Yeah, tell that to the Tibetans or followers of Falun Gong. That’s when I began smirking and waiting for the tour to be over.

I’m meeting my colleagues for one last dinner together. Once I return I’ll post pictures from today and describe more of the sights.

(I’m sure its just coincidence that my usually excellent connection to The Google died right after I searched for a link to Falun Gong. Yep.)

Shanghai Delights!

Wow. Just wow.

I’ve been to a lot of places in my life but Shanghai simply takes my breath away. Looking around, I just couldn’t believe all of this is here.

The training went much better than the Beijing one, in the opinion of most of us. Thirty-two partners attended, some from very far away. I skipped the stupid slide show and did my specialty – live demos and training. This let me cover more ground than Beijing’s session and the flow seemed to connect better with the attendees. It didn’t hurt that this hotel’s Internet connection is 3-4 times faster than the Beijing hotel’s.

We met at the hotel restaurant for lunch. With no grasp of the Chinese language, Gary and I fumbled our way through last night’s dinner and wound up with a good, but not great, dinner. I was frankly not looking forward to another bland dinner – and certainly not bland hotel food. What I got, though, knocked my socks off. It was top-shelf, amazingly flavorful Chinese food. I kept eating and eating until I couldn’t eat any more. What I thought was Chinese food – the stuff in America – didn’t come anywhere near the taste of this food. I was blown away! It’s certainly the best hotel meal I’ve ever had and the best lunch I’ve had in a long, long while.

In the middle of lunch I became the recipient of a spontaneous toast from my colleagues and the attendees at my table, for which I was surprised as well as deeply honored. Outside of my wedding day I’ve never been the recipient of a toast before (and those I shared with my lovely bride). How does it happen that people I’ve only just met would offer me a toast? I find it hard to fathom. Wow.

The rest of the training went smoothly. Everyone did well on the exam I give at the end of the course. As Gary thanked each one of us who put the session together, I told everyone that it was my great pleasure to have been with them today (and I meant it). I think they appreciated hearing that.

My colleague Jenny then helped me book a tour of Shanghai for tomorrow. Following that I had a brief chance to blog the previous post before we all headed out to dinner.

Our dinner tonight was for traditional Shanghai food at the famous Xiao Nan Guo restaurant. We feasted on roast duck; pork leg; roast lamb; beef; white radishes; seafood including sea cucumber, a succulent grouper-like whitefish, and even raw (!) shrimp; and bottle upon bottle of red wine!

Everyone was psyched about today’s training and the mood was festive. I made the mistake of sharing what my tour guide told me back on Saturday. He asked if my Chinese colleagues had taken me out for a big dinner. When I said not yet he told me to expect it. It is a Chinese tradition to treat guests to a big meal and massive amounts of alcohol. Once the alcohol loosens you up your true character shines through, you see. I shared this with my friends and immediately “cheers” became “bottoms up” (or “gala” in Chinese)! We began to down multiple full glasses of wine! I soon begged we “pace ourselves” in order to “make it a long night,” just to inject a little sanity back into things (though the wine was outstanding and I would’ve been willing, if not able, to drink them under the table).

Midway through the dinner, I looked around the table at these friends who were all, with the exception of Gary, total strangers just one week ago. I was enjoying myself so much that right then and there I began to memorize as many details of the scene as I could. I didn’t want it to end, and I never want to forget it.

We had the waiter take a picture of our group. From left to right are Tony, Alex, Jasper, Ja Ja, Dork Boy, John, Gary, George, and Jenny.

Dinner did end, though, at which point Jenny and George volunteered to take Gary and me on a quick tour of the riverside of downtown Shanghai, better known as the Bund. It was skyscraper after eye-popping skyscraper. Neon everywhere. And a good smattering of colonial-era buildings were thrown in for spice, too. If it weren’t for a chilly wind blowing in from the coast we may have walked down the boardwalk for an hour or more.

George is Chinese and on the younger side. He was in awe of my history of travel. I’d mention someplace I’d been and he would hang on my every word, a faraway gleam in his eye. One day, I told him, he may have the same opportunity to see the world as I have. I think he will.

Now I’m back at the hotel with so much to write about and so little time. I’ve been smiling so much today I think my face is permanently stuck. It’s been a fantastic day on so many levels. Already I’m making plans to return here some day.

Tomorrow starts early again as I hop a taxi to meet the day’s tour group at another hotel. I’ll have eight sights to see on my day-long tour. After that I’ll meet my colleages once again for another dinner, and this time it won’t be Chinese food but Italian for a change. Its all been so very fun that if it weren’t for my family being so far away I’d find it hard to leave!

Oh, and see shots of this amazing day in the gallery, of course.

Successful Shanghai Training! Woot!

I met recently with a large client and came home wearing a suit – a rarity for me. When my son Travis asked me about this strange outfit, I jokingly told him it was my “monkey suit.” Travis then spent the rest of the day referring to it as a monkey suit. He’ll probably call them that forever! In light of my disposition for casual dress I can’t decide whether his calling them monkey suits is good thing or bad thing!

Well, the monkey suit is off for good now! Training is complete after an outstanding session here in Shanghai. Things went amazingly smoothly, I covered far more material than I did in Beijing, and attendees really seemed to like what they saw. Today’s session alone made the whole trip worth it. I’m very pleased!

I’ve got some blog posts to catch up on but they’ll have to wait a few hours more. I’m joining Gary and the Shanghai team for a celebratory dinner tonight. (I’m guessing it will be Chinese food!) Then I’ll be back to add more of my thoughts on China before turning in for the night. The local team has arranged for me to take a day-long tour of Shanghai tomorrow, which I’m greatly looking forward to. The weather should be nice and picture-worthy, so expect more dazzling additions to the gallery! Incidentally, I copied the day’s photos up there (at least, the day’s so far).

More Beijing Pictures

I updated the gallery with shots from Tuesday’s training. Also there are a few pictures of the Beijing Holiday Inn Central Plaza. As you can see, the room is like any other Holiday Inn.

Beijing was unusally clear again Wednesday morning so I got a few more shots of the skyline from my hotel. I also couldn’t resist a shot of the neon above the Shanghai airport. You can also see my Shanghai hotel room.

I can really tell I’m farther south now. The sun rose sooner this morning than the previous days. It was a compelling sight out my Shanghai hotel this morning so I snapped a few of it. You’ll have to wait 12 more hours to see those!

Time to get dressed and enjoy my complimentary breakfast in this beautiful hotel, the Jian Guo Hotel Shanghai.

Shanghai Dinner On The Fly

Ah, Shanghai. Where else can you enjoy the view of glittering skyscrapers together with the aroma of raw sewage? I suppose that sums up where China is in its rapid growth: between two worlds.

We walked to a popular area of downtown where we eventually found an interesting Chinese restaurant. Unlike the restaurants in Beijing, this one didn’t cater to Western diners. The menus had no English whatsoever and none of the staff spoke English, either.

Gary and I managed to point to the pictures well enough to order decent-tasting dishes. Gary ordered some kind of fish in a cold sauce and a plate of beef in a spicy sauce. I ordered a stir-fry with walnuts and ham cubes. It was very good.

On the walk back to the hotel I had the urge to visit the corner Best Buy, just because every corner in America seems to have one. Unfortunately (or fortunately, depending) it was closed.

Tomorrow’s another training day, so any looking around will have to wait. I hope to soon get a chance to see this city in the daylight.