Can someone explain to me why anyone gives a flip about the Oscars? With all the things going on in the area and the world, why is the Oscars at the top of the front page? Why is all the ink wasted discussing what so-and-so wore? Where are the people who care about this?

In my mind the Academy Awards is nothing but a Hollywood circle-jerk: a bunch of overpaid bimbos and bozos patting themselves on the back, sneering “we’re more perfect than you are” at America. Its the biggest, clique-ish private club around. We peons are invited to gawk.

Sorry but I don’t get it. If Hollywood wants to congratulate itself by passing out awards among its members, that’s fine with me. I just don’t see why anyone outside of Hollywood should care. I can’t name a single person whose life will be directly affected by this show. Maybe my movie-biz friends can enlighten me.

Then again, if there’s one thing good that might come out of it, perhaps it will knock Anna Nicole Smith out of the news. Last I heard she was still dead.