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Enter The Bambino

The Bambino made its first public performance Thursday afternoon when Kelly and I went in to listen to its heartbeat.

Kelly’s been pregnant for 11 weeks and we’ve been playing an elaborate ruse with our friends in trying to keep it secret. With the appearance of a healthy heartbeat, we’ve got the confidence to let everyone know.

I had some fun with the event by writing a fake news story that was based on an incident over the holidays. We went to a party where my brother had rented a Karaoke machine and he and I hammed it up. Part of the act included acting comedian-like and announcing that Louie Anderson is up next,” and then dropping the microphone.

What makes this funny? A few too many drinks.

What was to be a routine check of a baby’s heartbeat turned bizarre Thursday afternoon when the baby grabbed the microphone and began singing karaoke tunes. Doctors examining Kelly Turner expecting the tiny heartbeat were instead astonished to hear “My Way” sung in a tiny voice.

“I really don’t know what to make of this,” said Dr. Hethfield of the Raleigh OB/GYN. “Even though the baby doesn’t have a lyric sheet – it doesn’t even have eyes yet – it somehow knows all the words. Must be something in the genes.”

“You’re telling me,” sighed Kelly Turner, as she rolled her eyes at her husband, Mark. Kelly then pleaded with the doctor for some kind of cure, but was flatly told her husband was incurable.

The mystery deepened even futher when the baby announced that Louie Anderson would be its little brother before dropping the microphone.