Had a funny episode before Sunday night’s basketball game at the RBC Center. In an attempt to catch weapons of mass destruction or something, the staff checked the entering crowd using metal detectors. After what seemed like a long wait, I stepped up to be scanned.
The staffmember was as cheerful as Aunt Bea, a demeanor sure to strike fear in the hearts of would-be terrorists. She waved the wand around aimlessly, using it more as a prop for her small talk rather than a tool for finding rocket-propelled grenades.
She was practically inviting me over for cookies and ice cream when the wand squawked over my pocket. She looked up.
“Ah, that’s my cellphone,” I said as I held it up for her.
Crack counterterrorism expert that she is, Aunt Bea wanted to make sure I was telling the truth (terrorists can be wiley, you know). She waved the wand over my phone. Sure enough, the wand squawked.
Satisfied she had done her part to protect America, she waved me through.